Welcome to The LDS Brain! This is going to serve as a place for me to talk about my feelings on the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, as well as my personal struggles and victories in everyday life.
A little bit about myself: First off, my name is not really Ezekiel. I want to be very clear on this. So why hide behind a pseudonym you ask? Privacy. Protection. I actually live a fairly public online life, and some of the things I may talk about on this blog may not be very popular among some of the geekier, more academic, and more liberal circles I tend to mingle with. I want this to be a place where I can speak freely without concern that something I have said may be looked down upon if I ever come across an anti-Mormon grant evaluator (unlikely, perhaps, but no impossible). In short, I think Egon said it best. "Don't cross the streams."
Having said all that, I am married to my beautiful wife, and we have an awesome son. They're names are not Jade and Eugene, but we can pretend that. Heck, their names might change as I write. :) Jade and I are looking forward to having another baby in the fall, and that's pretty exciting.
As for my professional career path, I am currently working on my Master of Neuroscience degree, and I'm focusing on different environmental factors and how the effect brain development. Which brings me to one of the topics I want to focus on with this blog. It seems like over the last few years there has been a huge surge of people who find Christianity to be absurd. More specifically, the LDS church has come under a ton of scrutiny. I'm sure we can all blame Mitt Romney for at least most of that. Let's face it, having a Mormon run for office is going to cause an increase in press coverage (both positive and negative).
The church takes a pretty hard stance on some major issues, and I can't make the claim that I completely understand all the reasons behind the Church leaders do or say what they do. I heard a great talk a while back, however, that made a great point that I have really taken to heart (darn it if I can't remember who gave it, but I believe it was a BYU devotional). The speaker talked about not knowing all the answers, and how moments that you question your own faith are critical in your time here on the Earth.
I faced quite a few of these during my undergraduate career, and looking back there were a few that really challenged me. In an Astronomy class, we went through the entire history of how the Universe began. At first, I entered the class thinking "Alright, here we go. Big Bang Theory, eh? Well, this is a bunch of crap. As long as I can spit it out, I can deal with it I guess." Soon, however, we started learning all about how gravity was the central creative force in the Universe, and that as mass grouped together, planets and stars were formed. My professor explained to me using science how the current theories on the creation of the Universe were as close as we could understand right now. The crazy part was that at the end of the course, I believed him.
Another class, Animal Psychology this time, challenged an even more controversial topic: evolution. For the longest time, I always battled this one. I had gone through several biology classes before. I had endured the evolution and natural selection bits, spit them out for the test, and pushed them back into the recesses of my brain. This time, however, my professor started showing us very specific examples (that I of course can't remember as I write this) of how obvious it was that some current animals had evolved via natural selection. By the end of the course, I could see the logic and was beginning to believe in the Theory of Evolution.
Here's the next obvious question then: why do I still believe in God and everything the church teaches? There's a few reasons, actually.
#1. I continue to have confirmation from the Holy Ghost that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, that Joseph Smith translated it through the power of God, and that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is His kingdom on the Earth. In short, I have prayed to Heavenly Father and outright asked Him if all of this is true. There are a lot of people who get so caught up in all the details and logic that they forget God. There are so many questions and details that we could get tangled in that we may never just stop and ask God if the church is true. I, however, always fall back on this. It is my foundation.
#2. I've learned to check my sources. One of the biggest things I've learned as I have ventured into the world of academia is that you need to know your facts. There are so many things that have been said by leaders of the church that are not considered doctrine. You may have a quote from an apostle that your Great-Aunt Whitney wrote down at a pot-luck once, but that doesn't mean that its doctrine. The truth of the matter is that even President Monson makes mistakes sometimes, and there's a difference between what he declares to the world over the pulpit during General Conference and what he says at a little Stake meeting. There have been a lot of things that have been speculated on by leaders of the church (especially in the early days), and its important to be able to distinguish between doctrinal statements and speculative conversation. You'll be surprised to find that some things you thought were hard doctrine end up being nothing more than LDS folk-lore when you track down the actual quotes and sources.
#3. I've learned that it's okay to say "I don't know." Let's get back to that talk I was talking about. There are things that will come along and challenge our testimony. Things that don't currently fit with our current understanding of the world, the church, and the Plan of Happiness. That is totally okay. We aren't nearly as smart as we think we are.
I'll be honest, I still don't know how I feel about evolution. Parts of it still clash with my spiritual understanding of God's plan for us, but parts of it make so much sense its scary. What I do know is that God created Adam and Eve, and that men are that they might have joy. I know WHY God created Adam and Eve, even if I don't entire understand how. Do I have my theories? Yes, but I am constantly taking my own personal beliefs and weighing them against what I know about science and what I know about religion. There is a place in the middle that I am creating my own understanding of the world. The church has made it clear in the past that the conversation of science will be left to the scientists, and that they will focus on talking about the salvation of mens' souls. I'm okay with that. Would I prefer a one-on-one with Heavenly Father, and have him just sit down and say "Alright, here's the answers to all your questions. This is the exact timeline from when the Universe started to when you were born." I believe that one day I will get my answers. Until then, however, I'm comfortable being where I am. Its okay to not know all the answers.
Wow, so I just started writing and all of this came out. Insane! I hope this blog will be as fulfilling for you, the reader, as it is for me. If you want to follow me on Twitter, I'm @theLDSbrain, and if you want to e-mail me, and the LDS brain at gmail dot com.
"In short, I have prayed to Heavenly Father and outright asked Him if all of this is true. There are a lot of people who get so caught up in all the details and logic that they forget God. There are so many questions and details that we could get tangled in that we may never just stop and ask God if the church is true. I, however, always fall back on this. It is my foundation."
ReplyDeleteObviously, this is the brick wall that you hit with nearly every MormonTM. "I know because God told me so, and until God tells you the same thing, you are wrong." Your experiences cannot be validated, cannot be replicated, cannot be shared in any meaningful way.
You do not know what you do not know. “I’ve had a mystical experience,” you may counter. “I’ve felt a burning-in-the-bosom. I’ve heard the still-small-voice.” So have I. To have felt the effect of the Holy Ghost does not mean we can take for granted its cause. What we perceive as an external, independent influence may in fact be a mere product of the subconscious mind.
In other words, I have sat through a number of F&T meetings, and it's apparent to me that the Holy Ghost has told my fellow ward-members some crazy, messed up stuff.
Religious belief is born from the ego. It reflects our desire to exert control over a universe that cares neither whether we live or die. It reflects our fervent desire to escape suffering and death and be reunited with loved ones long deceased. Most of all, religion reflects our yearning for certainty.
My heart wants me to live forever with my loved ones without sorrow or pain. If I rationalize that I will live forever, then it feels comfort, peace, even ecstasy. This, I think, is what we mistake for the Holy Ghost telling us the Church is true and that Thomas S. Monson is a prophet.
My religion is a religion of uncertainty, not certainty—insecurity, not security. I have no foundation to speak of, and that is the difference between you and me. The next time you approach the evolution debate, you need to do more than acknowledge that you do not have all the answers. Rather, you need to accept the possibility that you may be utterly wrong about everything. That is the only honest and worthwhile way to approach things.
I've heard this theory before, Arkwelder. However, the apostles themselves spoke of feeling the Spirit while they walked with the Saviour. "Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?" (Luke 24:32) This was very clearly a spiritual experience for the apostles, and not just a social affirmation or psychological reconciliation.
DeleteAs for being unable to validate, replicate, or share my experiences in a meaningful way, I suppose it depends on what you consider to be meaningful. If you are talking about hard scientific proof, then you are correct. The scientific method cannot prove spiritual things. In reality, it doesn't PROVE anything, it DISPROVES things. So the real question becomes, can the scientific method DISPROVE that I felt the spirit, and the answer is the same. No, it can't. There are too many other variables that would confound any meaningful study that you could try and conduct.
If you are willing to look past empirical evidence, and consider God's way of seeking truth, I would direct you to Alma 32 and Moroni 7. The Psalmist warned "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6) It is really tempting to look at something that seems so illogical and say "I'm smarter than this so-called God." Anybody who humbles themselves and opens their heart to the possibility that the gospel is true can have the exact same experience that I have had.
As for your final point, I can assure you that I have considered the possibility that I'm wrong about everything, and that everything the Church teaches is wrong. I'm here to tell you that I have waded through the doubt and skepticism and come out on the other side.
I'm planning on writing a post on the pursuit of knowledge, so anything you want to contribute to that is absolutely welcome. I think understanding how we come to understand the truth is a big question, and its an important topic to address.
Hey Ezekiel,
ReplyDeleteI’m glad to see that you’ve started a blog to explore your religious views and help others along the way. I applaud you for that. I think it’s just what Elder Ballard has encouraged us to do. I am, however, troubled by your apparent wavering on the matter of evolution, a subject that is a serious theological threat to the veracity of the scriptures. As to the irreconcilable incompatibilities between evolution and the Gospel, I would be pleased if you referred to my article, “Scriptural Problems with Evolution” (http://loyaltotheword.synthasite.com/scriptural-problems-with-evolution.php). There I have assembled a long list of points that I feel are insurmountable for those who are trying to synthesize the Gospel with evolution theory. Also, you may be interested in my humble attempt at a doctrinal and scientific critique of evolution in my article, “Man’s True Origin” (http://loyaltotheword.synthasite.com/mans-true-origin.php). For further and more qualified research on the topic, I would suggest Walt Brown’s “In the Beginning” as an excellent general place to start.
Yes, scientific theories and revealed religion can be friends, if they reach the same conclusions. But in the case that they reach dramatically different conclusions, such as with evolution, then they are necessarily at war. Which shall we default on, revealed truth or postulations about fossils? As the First Presidency said, “Man, by searching, cannot find out God. Never, unaided, will he discover the truth about the beginning of human life. The Lord must reveal Himself or remain unrevealed; and the same is true of the facts relating to the origin of Adam’s race—God alone can reveal them. Some of these facts, however, are already known [i.e. from the scriptures], and what has been made known it is our duty to receive and retain.” (Joseph F. Smith, John R. Winder, Anthon H. Lund, “The Origin of Man,” 1909).
Thanks for you comment, Loyal. :) As for your concerns about evolution, I think you may have misinterpreted my stance on evolution. I was simply stating that, in my opinion, evolution is a valuable model in my field of study. Virtually all of our understanding in modern biology comes from understanding natural selection. In reality, I am more an advocate for natural selection than evolution.
DeleteAt any rate, in my research, I have found no official statements that have outright denounced evolution all together. Granted, there have been many prophets speak on the issue, but those have been their opinions, and statements have been made on both sides of the issue. A few of interesting articles I've found that collect a bunch of great information:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mormon_views_on_evolution
http://en.fairmormon.org/Mormonism_and_science/Evolution/Official_stance
http://blog.beliefnet.com/flunkingsainthood/2010/09/why-mormons-should-embrace-evolution-byu-biology-professor-steven-peck.html
Don't get me wrong, I don't accept the entirety of evolutionary theory, but I can see great merit in parts of it. As a scientist, I cannot deny the evidence that exists with regard to genetic changes across generations. I see it every day. The origin of man is an interesting topic, however, and one that the Church has made a little more discussion about.
"Upon the fundamental doctrines of the Church we are all agreed. Our mission is to bear the message of the restored gospel to the people of the world. Leave Geology, Biology, Archaeology, and Anthropology, no one of which has to do with the salvation of the souls of mankind, to scientific research .... We can see no advantage to be gained by a continuation of the discussion ... but on the contrary are certain it would lead to confusion, division and misunderstanding if carried further. Upon one thing we should all be able to agree, namely, that Presidents Joseph F. Smith, John R. Winder and Anthon H. Lund were right when they said: 'Adam is the primal parent of our race.'" (First Presidency, 1931)
I guess my point was that as a scientist, I have been forced to reconcile the apparent contradiction between creationism and evolution more than most people in the church. For reasons we don't understand, God has chosen to withhold the HOW of the creation. Like Henry Eyring and James E. Talmage, I see that there is some merit to the scientific evidence of evolution. However, I don't have any idea how God actually did it all. I think President Harold B. Lee said it best when he said:
"Perhaps if we had the full story of the creation of the earth and man told to us in great detail, it would be more of a mystery than the simple few statements that we have contained in the Bible, because of our lack of ability to comprehend. Therefore, for reasons best known to the Lord, He has kept us in darkness. Wait until the Lord speaks, or wait until that day when He shall come, and when we shall be among the privileged either to come up out of our graves and be caught up into the clouds of heaven or shall be living upon the earth likewise to be so translated before Him. Then we shall know all things pertaining to this earth, how it was made, and all things that now as children we are groping for and trying to understand.
Let's reserve judgment as to the facts concerning the Creation until we know these things for sure."